Let’s get the basics out of the way, I will not be getting a tattoo ever. It’s a happy no from me. I do not even have FOMO on this issue. Hyperpigmentation is the only shading allowed on this girl’s skin and I have a lot.
But for the sake of flexing literary muscles and all that, my imaginary tattoo would be a phoenix rising out of the ashes. On a string of birds in flight. It won’t be small, and it would be on my back. In movies, I like it when this clean-looking actor removes their shirt to reveal the most extensive inked art on their torso. Love me a good reveal. Think 4 in the Divergent series, Nathan Caine in Novocaine, or even good old Scofield in Prison Break. If you have seen any of these, you get the point. I like the bigger tattoos. Actually, 4’s back tattoo in Divergent is probably my best movie tat of all time. I remember thinking that if I could be tempted on this issue, this is the tattoo that would have done it. Really pretty stuff.
The smaller tats on the neck, wrist, ankle and all the other places are cute, but they don’t really give that body art or the body is a canvas vibe which to me, may be the whole point. I know some people ink for remembrance. I understand that but it’s still a no for me. If it’s for beauty, henna artists can take all my money but yes, I will be expecting it to be gone in a few weeks. The permanence of it all, nah.
Now on to other matters, body no dey pain una? Haba! Tattoos are too painful. Even if my rejection of them was not a religious one, I would still reject them based on the pain factor alone! I see some people with tats in the most sensitive places and I wonder, what exactly are we looking for here? Please take your painful needle far away from my neck. Please and thank you!
Now that we have established that I have a pain threshold of non-existent, can we move on to the next prompt?
Chioma.
Chioma's Blog 
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